Warning: This post contains graphic language and descriptions of sexual violence.

Abusive relationships are designed to be difficult to leave. Abusers are known for isolating their victims from support and community, slowly eroding their boundaries, and downplaying their own violations, all of which makes it incredibly difficult for someone to pinpoint the exact moment when their relationship has crossed over into territory that feels uncomfortable, and thus, harder to even realize you want to leave before you’re in over your head. All of this is to say: whenArmie Hammer’s ex-girlfriend Paige Lorenze comes forward to Page Six and claims that Hammer was emotionally manipulative, had violent tendencies, coerced her into situations to which she didn’t consent, she shouldn’t have to self-deprecatingly describe herself as “sad” for going along with what Hammer wanted at first because she “wanted him to like [her].” Don’t we all, in our dating ventures, let alone those with admired celebrities, hope to be liked? But even Lorenze, age 22, knows that some people will read her account and ask themselves why she stayed. And so she honestly answers.