What do a skipping rope and a mouse have in common? If you’re thinking they both feature in the next Pixar movie, about an adorable rodent that trains a boxer to win the championship belt, prepare for disappointment. Because that movie doesn’t exist. And these things symbolise actual disappointment, in a tech industry obsessed with the wrong things. Specifically, subscriptions and AI.

That’s not to say subscriptions and AI are inherently evil. Unless Skynet is taking out yet another subscription to Kill All Humans Monthly, obviously. But subscriptions and AI do otherwise both have their place and their uses. Preferably far away from the vast majority of tech, admittedly.