Finding Joy

Maybe Let's Cool It With Our "Core Memory" Ambitions

Our children’s foundational experiences are tremendously important and not ours to curate.

by Jamie Kenney

19 hours ago

DisneyKids | YouTube

I’ve been a parent for 13 years and in that time I’ve seen a number of new terms coined or popularized. “Gentle parenting.” “Spirited child.” “Crunchy Mom”( and her counterpart, “Silky Mom”). And then there’s “Core Memory,” which debuted in Pixar’s Inside Out. Far be it from me to even give the appearance of besmirching this basically perfect movie, but I have mixed feelings about how we’ve made “core memory” a thing. So much so that I wonder if it might be better if we let this term go the way of Bing Bong.

For those of you who have not watched and/or cried through Inside Out a hundred times, the basic premise of “core memories” is that everyone has certain events that shape us as people. These moments stay with us as important touchstones that support us through the rest of our lives. For Riley, the film’s main character, the memory of ice skating with her family is a kind of mental happy place. A moment that grounds her in hard times and allows her to reclaim a sense of joy and contentment. The personified emotions in her head can play these memories like movies. They are bathed in a soft, hazy light, accompanied by a simple but evocative piano melody.