My husband and I struggle financially. Last year, we were comfortable enough to go on a vacation that we ended up going over budget for.

It seemed like a no big deal, we could earn that money back — except I found out I was pregnant shortly after.

I had to move out of my apartment and we moved in together but had to pay two rents for a period of time. He changed jobs at the end of this residence.

We then ate a second deposit and drained my savings to move closer to his job and I transferred my job to be close. I’m now 5 minutes from work and he is 10 from his. This rent is $450 higher than our previous one, we have to pay ALL utilities (only 1 before), and even with us both getting pay raises when moving, we still need to ask family for help about $500 a month to stay afloat.

We have our own reasons for not buying a HDB due to bad credit history.

He found a new job opportunity that would be significantly better than now.

The problem is that it’s an hour away via bus, MRT and 40mins drive in the morning peak hours.

We’re only 6 months into this new lease, living off a painfully strict-to-the-penny budget, and petrol prices are still crazy high. In my mind, this pay increase would go straight to the petrol he’d use for the drive and he’d be away from home 13+ hours a day for work and the drive.

Our baby is 7 months old and we rely on one of us being home or our parents driving 30 minutes to us to babysit for free.

Don’t get me wrong, I was him (both of us) to make more money. We NEED more money. But I don’t understand why he needs to choose a job an hour away when we live in an area with plenty of places hiring. He thinks I’m dumb for not wanting him to make more money to support us, and our family and friends are split on what to think. I’m lost on what to do now… how….