My ex cheated on me, after that we’ve went back and forth over getting back together or leaving multiple times.

We’ve talked everything through about our lack of communication and disagreements and decided to patch back.

But most recently, he told me he would like me to leave again as he is unable to let ‘her’ go still. And with her still in his heart, he is unable to love me properly and felt that it was unfair for me to stay around.

He confessed that he was still texting her ‘as friends ‘ and would often miss her and have the urge to meet her.

He felt that it affected the relationship and even though he still loves me alot, he is able to do it properly with her involved.

And that his cheating history has already ruined the relationship and that there’s no turning back.

I just can’t understand why he can’t let go of the past and just solely focus on me ( stop contacting her and try his best to properly love me again) , when I did. I forgave him and tried so hard to be the perfect girlfriend. But he never even tried to put in the effort to stop contacting her and try to forget her.

He told me to not take him back again even if he begged. So that he can regret for life. And hopefully stop his fickle mindset.

But I still can’t help but keep trying to start conversations and wanting to know about his whereabouts. What should I do?

Here are what netizens think:

He already made things pretty clear. What’s the point of keeping a guy who isn’t interested in you anymore?

There’s no such thing as being a perfect gf & you do not need to lower your value for him. Everyone has flaws and ppl are looking for another one to accept it mutually.

Letting him go is not a bad thing (thou you are insistent & unwilling now).

Sometimes in life, you have to let go of something in order to gain something better. I am sure you will have a beautiful life in future with someone who is RIGHT for you.

After 10-20 yrs, when you look back, you will feel how silly you are today if you choose to lower your value for a low quality guy.