For J. Cole, “living the dream” is a tenuous prospect. Throughout the promotional lead-up to his new project, The Off-Season, the 36-year-old rapper is reflecting on the challenges he felt after attaining rap superstardom.

In a recent SLAM cover story, Cole revealed that he asked himself, “Now what?” after the success of the 2014 Forest Hills Drive album and tour, and ended up feeling “uninspired” when he tried writing rhymes again.